Jax Magma predicts the winner of Newsroom Street Fight
By kaspeckman | February 23, 2012
For those of you haven’t listened to local radio, watched local news, read any local papers or magazines, been on Facebook or Twitter in the last two months or know anyone who works in the local media or PR, you probably haven’t heard of the Newsroom Street Fight—Saturday, February 25 at 10 AM.
Allow me to explain: Local media outlets, including Action News, Channel 4, First Coast News, Folio Weekly, Jacksonville Business Journal, WJCT, WOKV, and, of course, Jacksonville Magazine are competing in a double-elimination dodgeball tournament to benefit the Police Athletic League. That’s right, folks, red rubber balls will be hurled at some of your favorite TV reporters, radio hosts, print journalists and one very special calendar blurb writer (Note to my fellow competitors: I’d prefer to be hit in the arse as I’m less likely to feel it through all of the “padding”) all for charity.
Some teams are bragging that they have a Jaguars player on their team—offensive lineman Eben Britton is WJCT’s “ringer,” which clearly they need (have you seen how tiny those people are), and running back Rashad Jennings is taking one for the WOKV team, despite being on the Jags’ injured reserve list—however, the team that everyone should truly be worried about is Jax Magma. (As a side note, a friend, who happens to be a police officer, suggested that we just throw it at the Jags’ players hands since they’ll never catch it. Good one, JB.)
Team Jax Magma, you see, has a true expert, a “dodgeball assassin” as he likes to refer to himself, as our coach. Kevin Porter, producer/director/writer/actor and president of Iconic Innovations Media Group, just so happens to have starred in a little movie you may have heard of called Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story in which he played Lazer of the Purple Cobras. And if the other teams aren’t worried about the professional dodgeball advice that he has imparted to us, they should, at the very least, be scared of him personally. He’s a big dude. And not very friendly…
Newsroom Street Fight gets underway Saturday, February 25 at 10 AM at PAL’s Southside-Monument location (3450 Monument Road). Not only is the event free, but there will be vittles provided by Firehouse Subs and French Fry Heaven, plus raffles including hot-off-the-presses merchandise from The Jax ‘Stache. It will be a ball. Trust me.
As much as I’d like to brag that I know Team Jax Magma is going to win, I must admit that the real champs are the wimps at The Florida Times-Union who are dodging the whole event.