Sanchez vs. Tebow: Tale of the Tape and the Tail

By | March 22, 2012

Now that it’s finally official that Tim Tebow will be a New York Jet next year, we can get down to the really important question, as posed by People.com

Admittedly, it’s a tough decision, but one that clearly must be made if the Earth is going to continue to spin.

That said, The Specktator has compiled a list of physical stats and questions to ask yourself before choosing between these über-fit, virtually chest-hairless athletes.

Mark Sanchez
Age: 25
Height: 6’2″
Weight: 225
*Arm span 33½”
*Hand span of 10½”

Tim Tebow
Age: 24
Height: 6’3″
Weight: 236
*Arm span 31¾”
*Hand span of 10¼”

* Important stats to consider if you enjoy cuddling and hand holding

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Still can’t decide which “hunky Jets QB” (People.com’s words not mine) you’d pick? Ask yourself:

• Do you prefer curly or straight hair on your man?
• Would you rather your guy to wear rubber bracelets commemorating children who have died from cancer, the U.S. Marine Corps and God or a necklace that looks like it was purchased in a Native American gift shop?
• Do you like perky or flat nipples on a fella?
• Would you want your beloved to be pure as the driven snow or give the old quarterback sack to 17-year-olds and Victoria’s Secret models?

Personally, I’m going to go with Tebow (shocker). And judging from People.com’s poll results, I’m not alone: 68 percent of respondents picked Timmy too.


1 Comment

Cam Brown on March 22, 2012 at 11:51 pm.

I think that is one of the worst photos of Tebow I have ever seen. I mean, like there are so few photos of the guy, they had to go with what was available.

Reply

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